Languishing In Utter Despair!

Two things have happened to me besides thinking about "Dennis" to cause this situation. The first thing is that TLLB (The Truth Laid Bear) has demoted me from a Crawly Amphibian back down to a Flippery Fish. I have nothing against fish, mind you, but it was much more exciting to be a Crawling Amphibian... they do taste like chicken. And who wants to be demoted to anything once you have reached a new height in achievement! My dream is to become an Adorable Rodent. First though, I have to get back to being a Crawly Amphibian, and then become a Slithering Reptile. Once a reptile, I will set my sights on becoming a Flappy Bird. I really like birds. But I truly love Adorable Rodents. Sigh.

The second thing, which has definitley upped my level of despair to utter despair, involves one of the highlights of my day. My usual routine when I sit down at my computer after work is to read the first two blogsites listed on my Favorite Links list. They happen to belong to my two oldest offspring. They are both very funny! The fact that I know them well makes their posts even funnier. Lemming Fodder posts on his blog randomly because of his hectic work schedule and the fact that he gets moved around the country a lot. Random_Speak, however, is a regular poster. So... when she doesn't post, I notice. When she doesn't post for a few days, I wonder what's up.

It has now been over a week since she has posted something new. This is not normal. This also has created havoc with my usual happy routine of picking up my spirits after work. No Borders tractor beams of doom, no female impersonators delivering furniture, no complaining about interpretive dancing, no intriguing laundromat stories, no ugly art, and most importantly no stories about how she is languishing in utter despair over whatever. This is an outrage!

Please, if you are a seeker of justice, if you are a person who supports the arts, if you are a person interested in the intelligent written word, if you are a person who just likes to guffaw, or even if you are just a person (no one will question your pedigree), leave a comment to lodge a complaint on her last blog. We must put a stop to this nonsensical lack of posting before it is too late. I am not one to normally languish in utter despair, and just look at me! It is dreadful! Please help. You know you can do it!