Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Lip Balm, Kitty Kisses, 1099s, Typewriters, and Carbon Paper--Not Necessarily In That Order

Yesterday was a very long day. Once a year I use two things--a typewriter and carbon paper. I hate both. Even more, I hate using them to type 1099s which I also experience only once a year. But it IS January, and it IS the law after all. So dutifully I got all my info together earlier in the month and yesterday was the big day.

Why you ask, in this age of computers is anyone still using a typewriter much less carbon paper?!? Some of you may even be asking "WHAT is carbon paper?" Well, I don't feel it necessary to educate you on this tonight. Go look it up in an encyclopedia... errr... on your encyclopedia on line. They may have pictures and an explanation there. I will tell you though, no explanation can take the place of experiencing carbon paper rubbings on your hands and clothing first hand. It's just one of those things.

You see, my computer program has not been set up to handle doing 1099's correctly. This is a situation which I have finally figured out how to remedy. This time next year, I will be smiling because I will be doing the 1099s using the updated computer program. I will buy a bottle of champagne to celebrate the occasion next year. I am sure that I will be able to find some co-workers to help me celebrate.

At least I can now do my W2s on the computer. In all fairness to typewriters, they still do have some uses for which a computer cannot compete. However, those uses should become obsolete and that would solve the problem and make a lot of people (me especially) happier and less stressed. I am way too used to typing on a computer keyboard...switching to an old typewriter once a year just doesn't work...especially because you cannot make any mistakes with carbon paper on those government forms!

So back to my long day yesterday... During the earlier part of the day I finished preparing the biweekly, semimonthly, and monthly payrolls. Once everyone actually turned in their time sheets this wasn't too difficult. I even called in the tax deposit early for next Monday. I listened to the maintenance man. I sorted through numerous receipts that various people had left on my desk... some with a notation of who they were from and what they were for... and some not. I answered several telephone messages... very pleasantly, I might add. I listened to the maintenance man. I processed numerous bills, placed a call to California because someone had mistakenly ordered 500 copies of something instead of the customary 50 (which lasts 2 years), and processed various incoming payments. I looked at my piles of filing to be done and decided to leave that for another day (maybe another year?) I stopped for a cup of tea. I made some necessary photocopies, put postage on the outgoing bill payments, listened to the assistant maintenance man, listened to the cook, listened to my boss ("mmmm this is soooo good"), took several calls on my cell phone while unsuccessfully balancing various pertinent papers in my lap, listened to another co-worker while picking up the papers I had spilled all over the floor, and after running an important errand to another building (getting a soda from the soda machine to fortify myself) borrowed the keys to my office from my boss since I had locked my office door with the keys still on my desk. After my love affair with the typewriter and carbon paper, I stuffed all of the W2s and 1099s into their respective envelopes. Sometime during the day I ate lunch (including a very yummy baked apple). Did I mention that I listened to the maintenance man? By the time I was done it was going on 8 p.m., and I was exhausted.

Ok, so I finally got home. I was too tired to write in my own blog, but I did take the time to peruse some that I like to read. I checked my own blog for comments, looked to see who had visited my site, and fixed myself a wonderful cup of hot chocolate. I brushed my teeth and got ready for bed. On my way to the bedroom I stopped and picked up my Burt's Bees Beeswax Lip Balm (great stuff) to put on my slightly chapped lips. After applying the lip balm, I turned on the TV in the bedroom, climbed into bed and settled in to watch the news. No sooner had I gotten comfortable and set the timer on the TV then along came the resident Siamese, Koko. After pawing the covers and taking about 5 minutes to settle down... just about the time I was starting to doze off, Koko discovered the lip balm and proceeded to lick it off my lips. Coming unexpectedly, it was quite a surprising sensation. I have seen what my cats eat. There was still a slight aroma of his last meal emanating from his mouth. I groaned, rolled over, grabbed a slurp of water from the bottle next to the bed, and closed my eyes to try to drift off to sleep while wondering if there was any hope that the maintenance man might just possibly have the next day off.


Anonymous said...

HAHAHA... yeah, I forgot to warn you that Koko loves any sort of lip gloss or chapstick.
-Koko's Human

L said...

eeeewww!!! he must have had Terribly Stinky breath! what a weirdo!

dayna said...

I'll have to try the lip balm (not around my cats). Cheers.

L said...

what? no new posts? You are being Completely Irresponsible!

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